Neo-Ji’s Question

Now that the bottom has been hit, things can only get better. There’s more to come on the general drama that was the previous post but I’m not ready to talk about some things yet. But I must say that if there’s one major problem this move to India will bring, it’s the lack of instant availability of 60% dark chocolate to counter PMS πŸ˜›

Moving on to other things,Β I don’t know how I didn’t have this blog on my blogroll as I read it quite often. However, here is a post in reply to Neo-ji’s question in response to my rather dramatic comment (quite a conversation is happening here), Neo asks an important question.

“Well, how are young Indian women supposed to know how to systematically obliterate their individuality if you don’t write about it?”

The answer is, I refuse to write about it. As a woman, I sometimes dread moving back to India permanently. As much as I love being an Indian and I love the culture and my background, there are many things I know I will find much more annoying after having tasted freedom outside.

I’ve written about the constant harassment Indian women face on the streets. I’ve written about the irrational need for married Indian women to appear married. I’ve talked about endless expectations from women married or single. I’ve criticized the unrealistic expectations set by daily soaps. I’ve blogged a bit about the horror that is acid attacks.

I get carried away on the topic of Indian culture. I’ve written more than there is to be said on the topic of bharatiya sabhyata than it really deserves. I’ve talked about my version of the “traditional yet modern” woman and my admiration of people who can really do as they please.

I’m a feminist and proud to admit it. Although I do have my own doubts. I’ve (Hai Raam!) mused about crushes etc. Talked about the true love of my life and talked about my idea of a real man. Let’s not even get into the whole Marriage Market blog

Coming back to Neo’s question. What does it mean to be an Indian woman? It means that you’re dealt a hand with all odds against you but you come through with strength, grace, and the occasional bit of drama. To be an Indian woman means that you’re probably worse off than your sisters anywhere else in the world except maybe in the conservative Islamic world but you recognize that women everywhere face an uphill struggle.

The Indian woman doesn’t need an identity as female or brown or wheatish. She doesn’t really need to declare who she is. She knows that Indian society would probably fall apart if all women decided to go on strike. She knows that for all that she has endured over the centuries, she should be out for blood. But the Indian woman doesn’t really want revenge. All she wants is to move forward and do it without looking back.

5 Replies to “Neo-Ji’s Question”

  1. Completely unrelated to your post but I couldn’t help but comment on you reading neoindian :). He is my unofficial guide on how to go about my return to India dream πŸ™‚

    1. Heh! I was about to say the same. I don’t remember where he says it but there’s a bit about spotting the newly returned by seeing who asks for a “nonfat latte” at coffee day.

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